young_oldman | IC Inbox: Empatheias

She's flown in worse situations. A rain of bullets is much more complicated to fly through than dodging high winds and lightening, although to be sure it is still a nuisance. It doesn't deter her-- in fact, it only makes her travel faster, carefully covering the basket with her arms. Meanwhile she continues to attempt to send positive emotions towards him. In the past, she's sent positive hope to Peromei when the Arhetei was experiencing the worst of her despair; sending Lu Meng some positivity and fighting through his cocktail of angst will be difficult, but realistically doable. Her hope and happiness that he is alive is all the fuel she needs to persistently fend off that onslaught of despair. For now, at least.

Within minutes-- the fastest she's ever traveled-- she'll be at the ruins, touching down upon the ground and using her hand to wave away the rain directly above her. The hem of her skirt are stained with wet mud as she runs, but she doesn't care. Rushing into the ruins, she begins to check everywhere for him, making her way through each level until she'll find him.

She has to go deep then. There's no sight of him in the first level, nor the second or third. But when she's at the top of the spiral staircase that leads to the fourth level she can hear snatches of sound, echoing up the empty space. Strangled noises, and uneven, ragged breathing.

If she goes down, she'll find him near the small pool, collapsed on his knees and doubled over as if in pain. But his body has returned to him; hands and fingers, his arm, his leg. Said fingers are actually digging into his arms, so hard that blood trickles down from each finger, sliding down his newly restored arms and dripping on the rocky floor.

His back is to the stairwell so she won't be able to see his expression. But the messages she got from his amulet, the rain storm beating down on them above, and the fact that his shadow has enlarged, stretching out to cover the floor behind him. The shape of his shadow is distorted even; it emits black wisps, continuing to casting the floor in an inky and sticky black sheen.

There's no blood anywhere, but the room smells bad, like the cabin.]

At last she finds him, and her hope flares for an entire second at finally seeing him again and alive!

That hope is short-lived, however, as it quickly breaks away into worry once she sees the state he's in. More blood, more pain. He's hurting all over again, despite that the torture he endured is over, that Ayumi is now contained. The stench from the cabin, the rain, that blood-- it all evokes unwelcome memories. She'd rather neither of them be reminded of that, so she waves her hand above her to clear the rain to a light drizzle. If he's just returned, it won't do to have him be wet and cold, bloody or broken.

She jogs over, slowing down to a stop just a few yards before him, setting down the basket she brought. After a nervous pause, she steps forward, her voice soft and careful. "L...Lu Meng."

She's called his name so many times, hardly ever getting more than a response besides his negative emotions that push her away. She doesn't think he wants to push her away; he's just hurt and fearful. Anyone would be, after going through that. "It's me... It's Sanae. I'm here to help..."

She reaches out toward him, to try to place a reassuring hand over his hunched shoulder.

The air around him is heavy and glummy, much like threading through a swamp. But when she pushes through it, when her touch finally brushes on his shoulder, she'll find that it's like touching ice; her fingers turn numb and begin to sting from the cold, an icy pinch that bites hard.

But the sensation at her fingertips will be far eclipsed by the vicious crack Lu Meng throws at her face. It's a powerful blow, heavy enough to break stone itself, and it carries with it tremendous rage and loathing, triggered by a fear so deep that he himself cannot understand. But it can all be derived back to a single sentiment that managed to slips through a crack in the emotional fortress that erected in his mind, roaring and ringing in Sanae's mind through their amulets.

Touch him, and he will kill you.

Edited 2015-09-11 23:06 (UTC)

Anyone may know a Touhou has impeccable skills at dodging; however, this skill works better from expecting that an enemy would attack them. Not a dear friend, as in this case.

His fist connects unequivocally with the left side of her cheek, smashing into both mandible and maxilla. Bones are not as sturdy as concrete; understandably it does more than dislocate her jaw, it smashes it up into her cheekbone, splintering structures meant to keep everything in place, breaking teeth and smashing tissue. Not given even a moment to react, she's slammed to the ground, hard, knocking her head to the stone floor. Blood spurts from her mouth in a strangled gasp. A labored reflex for coughing helps that she doesn't choke on that blood or the teeth he's knocked back into her throat. Although the area is already beginning to swell up with a thick tongue that tastes only warm liquid and iron, quickly diminishing her supply of fresh air.

There are no emotions for these initial moments-- she only feels pain. Then they start to flood in, overwhelming her mind in a quick panic-- croaking out his name one more time, pleading, before she can say nothing more. She quickly realizes that this is her fault, that he didn't mean to hurt her. It's her own fault for reaching out to him when she clearly should have asked first. The look in her eyes is one already of forgiveness and apology. She doesn't want to startle him. She doesn't want him to trigger any thing that might hurt him. I'm sorry--

She's sorry, she's sorry for frightening him-- and damn this frail body, can't she be stronger? Can't she push herself up to help him? He needs more help-- he needs to know that he's safe now! She came all this way for him, and now she can hardly even see straight.

She tries to push herself up, shuddering briefly, before she collapses on the ground. She won't be touching him again, not now. In fact, she won't be moving at all.

The last thing Sanae sees before she loses consciousness is him rushing over to her. His expression is one that mirrors her own panic, and right before eyes close she'll see him suddenly grabbing one wrist with the other hand, showing more confusion and fear then she'll ever see on him.

He's confused, bewildered, and yes, scared.

When next she awakens she'll feel cold and wet, her good cheek resting on that hand-made scarf she'd packed for him. Rain falls on her, and while Lu Meng's done his best to wrap her up in the very quilt that she had prepared for him, he can't prevent drops of water from sliding down her bangs, dripping onto her face. Perhaps that's how she came to; the water is certainly very cold and uncomfortable. But he's wrapped her injured jaw very well and tight, so although his steps are not very even or stable it won't be too jostled about.

And her simple quilt has been put to good use. It's well-made and long enough that he can tie her to him. Her arms are over his shoulders, also kept in place with the quilt that's been wrapped around her and his body together. Meanwhile her legs are dangling above the ground, knees bent, his hands (if she's aware enough, she'll be able to feel that he's wrapped them in bandages) hooking underneath her legs to hold her up and let her lean her body weight on his back.

She can't see his expression, and he doesn't respond when she begins to stir. But he keeps on moving, step by painful, slow step.

Edited 2015-09-14 06:01 (UTC)

Her consciousness blinks in and out, and so does her vision. Well, half of it, as the other eyes is swollen shut. But she can feel everything else around her. It's dark and cold, but she feels the warmth of someone close. However, sometimes she can't tell if she's slipped back into a dreamless sleep or if she's still awake. It's not until the pain in her cheek begins to throb to an unbearable point that it wakes her completely. She groans pathetically into his shoulder blade, her lips silently forming indistinguishable words to accompany the noise, before she draws in a quick hiss of breath.

But she can breathe. She can think. The next step after waking is to determine what happened, and just what is currently happening. The first thought on her mind is-- Lu Meng?

She speaks through the amulet, her mental voice hoarse and hushed just as her physical one would be. Yes, she-- she recalls finding him. And he had been hurt, and she had gone to him-- and then-- anger, quickly followed by confusion and panic. Lu Meng--!

She stirs, but the quilt is too tight, pressing him to her back. She recognizes it, though, as the one she brought to him. ....Ah, is it you? Is it really you? From the pain, from her joy of seeing him finally-- she can't help it. She's crying already. He might notice how the tears are warm compared to the rest of the rain, falling upon is back. You're-- you're alive, oh, Lu Meng, I'm s-so sorry...

For not protecting him, for failing him. For forgetting herself and reaching out to him, resulting in him breaking her half her face.

Her words fall into his heart like the rain; now his heart and his mind accept them, not repel. He lets them in; her words and tears, takes her apologies and her relief and he fears.

Yet he doesn't say anything. He makes no response back. For one moment, and it may be an awful, long one to Sanae, there's just an empty silence, punctuated only by the constant rain around them.

And then a whisper at the back of her head. So quiet that she might almost miss it, drowned out by the pitter-patter of the rain around them. But it is a drop of intense grief, and if she's not careful she will find her heart burdened by the same misery that's weighing on him.

Don't cry. Please.

She had wanted to touch his shoulder for reassurance, a gesture she had thought would lead to an embrace she'd have loved to give him. But look where that led?

In a way, she is embracing him, and weakly her arms do tighten briefly over his shoulders before going limp again. B-but...! You--... you died like that-- and I didn't stop it--

She also had wanted to be more composed when she'd see him, but pain makes it easier for her to express all of her emotions. She had wanted to be the one to take care of him when he appeared alive again, but thanks to her actions it's now the reverse. I'm so sorry-- I'm so sorry!

She wishes she could take that misery he feels and throw it off of the island, but she's in no current condition to even try at this point. A-and I'm sorry for touching your shoulder--

Stop.

He interrupts her there and then. Cuts her off, all sharp-like. And then his mental voice softens, hardness crumbling away like sandcastles at the beach.

Stop. He whispers to her again. Just...just stop apologizing. I beg you..

And then, just like that, the link between their crystals is stopped, leaving Sanae to her thoughts and him to his own. And he marches onward, like the soldier he is. Never looking back, never stooping or tiring or complaining of the damp and the cold.

He can do that. He can handle that.

But he can't handle what he's done. He needs to get her back to the city as fast as possible, because his grip on his emotions is slipping and he's afraid, afraid he's going to lose it again and, and hit her again and oh god what has he done--

...No. He can't think about that. Not now. Not when his priority is to get her seen to. He just needs to keep moving, and eventually they'll meet up with Bobby and Edea and they'll get her the help she needs.

Him? He'll just throw himself off the island. That's what he deserves.

Edited 2015-09-14 07:09 (UTC)

Taken aback by the sudden cut of connection, she stops speaking abruptly. Outwardly, he might hear another pitiful gurgle of air as she tries to speak again, only to be followed by a groan.

Sanae can't read his mind, but she can tell from the small storm around him that whatever it is, it's not good. She-- she has to do something-- anything! Anything at all, to help him. But she cannot concentrate on much herself, the flurry of her thoughts mixing with physical impulses of pain, staggered with each breath she draws. So although her mind threatens to give out once more, she persists-- focusing on the most important emotion to her, above her guilt, above her sorrow, above her regret at not helping him. What wins in the race is an emotion familiar to her heart, one that she shares with him freely. I'm... so... so happy that you have returned....

Subtly as the tide, the wind around them becomes milder, and the rain becomes warmer although it still pelts at their backs. His turmoil might be deep, but her joy and love remains true, placating the effects to become more bearable. Perhaps it's a silver lining to what has befallen him, an 'at least' point in his struggles. But that doesn't detract from how strongly she feels, hopefully making each step less harsh to traverse. When she can hardly think straight anymore, love remains the easiest to fall back onto, not despair.

If... if I cannot say sorry-- p-please... know that I am happy you are here... As the amulet is connected to her thoughts and she's semi-conscious as it is, more apologies are whispered without effort.

Oh, but how she attempts to stay conscious for as long as possible! Humming between broken teeth, she sings softly within her mind, trying to keep herself from fading into darkness again. She only manages this far:

Gaze I... at the moon,
     Myriad things a-...arise in...thought,
And my thoughts are....sad;--
     Yet, ...'tis not for me a...alone,
     That the.... autumn time has...

The words fade in and out without rhythm, growing ever fainter, until finally the miko slips into unconsciousness once again. As soon as she does, the rain reverts to its usual cold nature, falling heavier than before.

IC Inbox: Empatheias

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CW: Blood, Self-harm (?)

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CW: Physical violence

CW: blood

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CW: Self-harm

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